SOCIAL STUDIES - Published Monday January 26th, 2009
Last week I talked about risky behaviour. I intended to write more but limitations forced me to focus on the shadow side of risk. My point was that we engage in risky behaviours as a form of escapism.
Sigmund Freud who was the person who practically invented psychology said that the only way we can heal ourselves is to become conscious of why we do things. I think that most of us use our cars, subconsciously, as a way to vent anger, frustration and stress. We drive too fast, too aggressively, and basically do not enjoy the time in the car the way we should.
All of that being said, today I want to focus on the other side of risk. Conscious risk taking activities are in fact what are sorely needed in our society if we are going to survive the present woes.
Consider these bits of traditional wisdom: "If you are going to make an omelette, you have to break some eggs" or "you gotta spend a buck to make buck," and ask yourself if you live according to these sort of aphorisms or if you are more likely to play it safe?
I think that we have become a risk adverse society. There are those who somehow manage to escape from this aversion, and we all know their names: Conrad Black, Bill Gates, Warren Buffet, and Barack Obama; but for the majority of us, we wallow in mediocrity.
Have you heard how Karl Marx once called religion the "opiate of the people?" What he meant by that was that the dominant culture uses religion to keep us in our place. So we hear about heaven and therefore are content with our lot on Earth knowing we will be rewarded in the afterlife. Everyone uses this to chastize organized religion; but I wonder if we are missing his point.
When Marx wrote, the religious establishment was part of the governing structure of society. He was criticizing the way the ruling class oppressed the average person. Today, religion is on the periphery of society and it would be a far better comparison to say that it is politics and economics that rule the day, not the church and state.
So to paraphrase Marx in a modern context, marketing is the opiate of the people.
How does this opiate work? It convinces us that to succeed in life we have to keep up with the Jones's next door. We need a free standing bungalow, a white picket fence, two cars, two and a half kids and a dog.
We will get this if we keep our head down, our hands to the grinding stone, and mind our place. We will be entertained by buying big screen televisions and going to movies, watching sports games and drinking in the pub. All the while, we will forget that there is any need to do anything different and we will become good little citizens who don't take risks, because you know what happens to a nail that stands up . . . it gets hammered down.
But this is precisely where I am advocating a large scale revolution in thought. And I believe now is the time.
I believe this to be true for two reasons; the first is the very obvious and very visible breakdown of the current system of things. There has never been a better time to take a step away from the ludicrous free market system of borrowed hope.
Secondly, there is Barack Obama.
Now I know we are not American, and conceivably his presidency will have little impact on our day to day lives; but I am not so sure. I think he is becoming a role model of someone who is willing to take positive risks.
Here is someone who confronts reality head on, who says that life is not always easy, and that there will be struggles, and that it will only get worse . . . but . . . then he goes on to say if we are willing to stand up, if we are willing to work together, if we are willing to take a risk; anything is possible.
Buying a new television will not make our lives better and it will not make us happier. But being willing to take a risk and step outside of the day to day can change everything. I chose to begin a writing career at 40 because it was something I dreamt of doing; and it has made me happier.
I also choose to give my time and energy to causes that will make the world a better place, from disaster relief right through to local food banks, I do it with a sense of being willing to risk my own financial security to make someone else a little more equal.
I am no more successful than the next person at any of this; I simply have found that if I live my life by the maxim of trying to do one thing that scares me every day I end up growing into a better more content person. Don't get me wrong; I get sucked back in every five minutes, and right now I am sure my life would be more complete if I had a Blackberry. But being aware that you are being sucked in to something that someone else is doing to try and keep you content while nothing ever changes is part of the solution.
I think it is time for us to take the risk, stand up, and be part of the solution.
Wednesday, January 28, 2009
Tuesday, January 20, 2009
Self-indulgent risks reflect larger issues
SOCIAL STUDIES - Published Monday January 19th, 2009
The travel industry is not noticing any real decline due to the recession. They are offering deals to try and make you take a trip; so they might be losing a bit of money, but they are actually seeing record numbers of vacationers. Carnival Cruise line had its largest volume of bookings ever last week.
At first this seems a little strange since there are so many people on the verge of losing their livelihood, their home, or just their way of life. Six thousand Nortel employees, lots of Aliant employees, mill workers, every day we hear about another round of layoffs. We are not even close to what is happening in the States yet. Still we choose to spend thousands of dollars on a one-off disposable item like a trip to Disney World.
I think this has to do with the same reason people buy snowmobiles.
Bear with me, and I will bring this back around. When I lived in the Eastern Townships of Quebec, I lived on the side of Lake Champlain. Everyone, and I mean everyone, drove their "skidoos" onto the ice as soon as possible and as late as possible. They had drag races, and crossed indiscriminately into the United States. Now, at the same time every single one of them had a buoy tied to the back of the sled; because every single one of them lost that thing every year when it plunged through the thin ice.
They were also big into ice fishing and parked their big Buicks and Crown Victoria's on the ice until May, but that is another level of lunacy.
My brother went to Florida a few years back and jumped off a crane attached to a bungee cord.
This might all seem stream of consciousness but I have a theory that most of what we do now-a-days is actually done for escape. The curious thing about that is that the more risky our regular lives, the more pain and hardship we face, the larger the risks we take in our play time as well.
So think about the world. Iraq and Afghanistan, Oil prices and mortgage defaults, more than a thousand killed in Gaza. And what do we do? Go helicopter skiing and snowmobiling in the back country of British Columbia where avalanches are a real possibility. We go out on the ice when it is not safe. We drive too fast on highways when it is snowing. We take risks.
It is foolish if you think about it. The more we feel under the gun, the more stressed we are, the more likely we are to do things that will actually get us hurt. All the while, the actual pressure of the situation has made our ability to "talk ourselves down" almost non-existent.
The younger we are, the more we seem to be okay with this. I remember driving to Ottawa at 140 kilometres per hour during the ice storm in Quebec. It just never occurred to me that I might actually get in an accident. I see it all the time here, young people driving by me way too fast for the conditions; blissfully unaware of what is going to happen to them.
But it is not just young people. This phenomenon applies to everyone. The list of risky behaviors is unbelievably long; and it ranges from recreational risks like skydiving and scuba diving right through to the risks we take with alcohol, with sexuality, and even with deep fried foods.
Now, far be it from me to say that this is terrible.
I myself engage in escapism, as tame as reading and watching movies, playing World of Warcraft, right up to some real risky behaviours. I know that what I have written is true -- when I am stressed I am more likely to over indulge in everything. I also realize I have to learn to cope better.
From all historical accounts it would seem that at the end of the Roman Empire, during the dying days of one of the most powerful, stable, and innovative societies ever; everything went wrong in exactly this way.
People began to overindulge, it became very individualistic, very hedonistic, and the choices people made only made things worse. Instead of a sense of civic duty everyone turned to a sense of self-fulfillment. I can't even write about the things that went on in ancient Rome's twilight without getting into trouble. You could, however, read some of the other articles in this paper and get a pretty good sense.
Things are not so different here in the decline of the Western Empire.
My real fear is that the risk taking, self-indulgent attitude that is pervading our society is a real portent of what is on the horizon. This seems to be the end of our society as we know it, and we are, to steal a quote, fiddling as Rome burns.
I am not entirely sure what to turn our energy to; there are prophets and gurus aplenty, like David Suzuki and Eckhart Tolle, who are trying to offer suggestions. I guess I am simply trying to sound the alarm.
Perhaps if we are aware of some of the motivations that go behind our actions we might be better able to fight against the impulse towards self-destruction. At least, that is what my hopeful side keeps arguing. We can start small, by trying to limit our escapism and focus on engagement.
The more we try to be part of the solution, the less impact the problem might have on our lives.
The travel industry is not noticing any real decline due to the recession. They are offering deals to try and make you take a trip; so they might be losing a bit of money, but they are actually seeing record numbers of vacationers. Carnival Cruise line had its largest volume of bookings ever last week.
At first this seems a little strange since there are so many people on the verge of losing their livelihood, their home, or just their way of life. Six thousand Nortel employees, lots of Aliant employees, mill workers, every day we hear about another round of layoffs. We are not even close to what is happening in the States yet. Still we choose to spend thousands of dollars on a one-off disposable item like a trip to Disney World.
I think this has to do with the same reason people buy snowmobiles.
Bear with me, and I will bring this back around. When I lived in the Eastern Townships of Quebec, I lived on the side of Lake Champlain. Everyone, and I mean everyone, drove their "skidoos" onto the ice as soon as possible and as late as possible. They had drag races, and crossed indiscriminately into the United States. Now, at the same time every single one of them had a buoy tied to the back of the sled; because every single one of them lost that thing every year when it plunged through the thin ice.
They were also big into ice fishing and parked their big Buicks and Crown Victoria's on the ice until May, but that is another level of lunacy.
My brother went to Florida a few years back and jumped off a crane attached to a bungee cord.
This might all seem stream of consciousness but I have a theory that most of what we do now-a-days is actually done for escape. The curious thing about that is that the more risky our regular lives, the more pain and hardship we face, the larger the risks we take in our play time as well.
So think about the world. Iraq and Afghanistan, Oil prices and mortgage defaults, more than a thousand killed in Gaza. And what do we do? Go helicopter skiing and snowmobiling in the back country of British Columbia where avalanches are a real possibility. We go out on the ice when it is not safe. We drive too fast on highways when it is snowing. We take risks.
It is foolish if you think about it. The more we feel under the gun, the more stressed we are, the more likely we are to do things that will actually get us hurt. All the while, the actual pressure of the situation has made our ability to "talk ourselves down" almost non-existent.
The younger we are, the more we seem to be okay with this. I remember driving to Ottawa at 140 kilometres per hour during the ice storm in Quebec. It just never occurred to me that I might actually get in an accident. I see it all the time here, young people driving by me way too fast for the conditions; blissfully unaware of what is going to happen to them.
But it is not just young people. This phenomenon applies to everyone. The list of risky behaviors is unbelievably long; and it ranges from recreational risks like skydiving and scuba diving right through to the risks we take with alcohol, with sexuality, and even with deep fried foods.
Now, far be it from me to say that this is terrible.
I myself engage in escapism, as tame as reading and watching movies, playing World of Warcraft, right up to some real risky behaviours. I know that what I have written is true -- when I am stressed I am more likely to over indulge in everything. I also realize I have to learn to cope better.
From all historical accounts it would seem that at the end of the Roman Empire, during the dying days of one of the most powerful, stable, and innovative societies ever; everything went wrong in exactly this way.
People began to overindulge, it became very individualistic, very hedonistic, and the choices people made only made things worse. Instead of a sense of civic duty everyone turned to a sense of self-fulfillment. I can't even write about the things that went on in ancient Rome's twilight without getting into trouble. You could, however, read some of the other articles in this paper and get a pretty good sense.
Things are not so different here in the decline of the Western Empire.
My real fear is that the risk taking, self-indulgent attitude that is pervading our society is a real portent of what is on the horizon. This seems to be the end of our society as we know it, and we are, to steal a quote, fiddling as Rome burns.
I am not entirely sure what to turn our energy to; there are prophets and gurus aplenty, like David Suzuki and Eckhart Tolle, who are trying to offer suggestions. I guess I am simply trying to sound the alarm.
Perhaps if we are aware of some of the motivations that go behind our actions we might be better able to fight against the impulse towards self-destruction. At least, that is what my hopeful side keeps arguing. We can start small, by trying to limit our escapism and focus on engagement.
The more we try to be part of the solution, the less impact the problem might have on our lives.
Tuesday, January 13, 2009
There is much value in family, community
SOCIAL STUDIES - Published Monday January 12th, 2009
Once more there are news reports about polygamy, the practice of having more than one wife, and how abusive it is.
Admittedly, it always seems one-sided, there are not many stories of women with more than one husband. I can hear the jokes already.
I am not a fan of religious cults. And I certainly am not a fan of anything that even comes close to becoming abusive. But I do often think that there might be something a little odd about our North American way of life.
Instead of maintaining family bonds, we seem to do everything in our power to isolate ourselves from others. We are perhaps the opposite of polygamists -- we are loners bound together for personal gain.
Thomas Hobbes, one of my favourite social philosophers, said that the reason we establish communities is so we can keep an eye out for someone stealing our sheep. Okay, he didn't say it so simply, or quite like that, but he assumes we form relationships for self protection. He could be right. But I suspect there is more to it than that.
I think we need relationships because it fulfills us and allows us to develop into the people we are meant to be, and when we limit those relationships, we lose out on something.
When I was young my grandmother lived in the house with us. At one point I lived in a townhouse with another couple. My brother and his wife lived with me for a few months. And in each of those cases I remember life being better.
Our culture is getting more and more out of hand in terms of the demand it makes on average people. One income will not support a family anymore. The welfare system is ridiculous, you can make too much money for social assistance while at the same time not having enough for fuel oil.
So most people I know live in homes where there are two people working at careers, and where there is so much pressure and stress in those careers that what they really need to do at home is pass out. There is no time for grocery shopping, for cleaning, for connecting.
I have often thought about how much smoother everything would run with a multi-family configuration. Just imagine what it would be like to double the adults in a household. Imagine three or four incomes to pay for one house, one cable bill, and one heating bill. Imagine having more people around to help with chores, or to interact with kids.
There is simply no way that any one person can be everything for someone else, and there would be a lot less pressure if we were not so single minded in our definitions of relationship.
Now, before I get a lot of anti-polygamy hate mail; the old fashioned solution to what I am talking about is the multi-generational household. Where there are three or four generations of people living under one roof, contributing financially, and through their wisdom, to making everything work.
In most supposedly less developed countries this is still the norm.
And in those countries, children learn from grandparents how to do things, like fish, cook, think. They also come to understand morals, values, and families much more clearly than we ever do.
Another benefit is that we do not isolate the different generations, and shunt them off as no longer useful. Each person has a role no matter where they find themselves on the journey of life.
Don't get me wrong, I realize this is a pipe dream, and whenever I bring it up to people they remind me how hard it is for two people to get along, let alone three, four or more. Just deciding what to watch on television could become something that needs outside mediation.
And then there is the whole dealing with parents and in-laws issue. Discipline of kids and household management styles would certainly differ from person to person. So I don't claim that it would be easy by any stretch of the imagination to do this.
Still. . .
It supposedly takes a village to raise a child; and we have lost sight of that somehow. Most of us go through life relatively alone, and wishing we had closer friends, more family around, a better idea of what to do when something happens.
Community is an ideal that is worth going after.
I suppose it does not really matter where you get a sense of community; sitting on a school board, bowling league, church, or by actually trying to have relationships with your extended family. But we all need it.
I guess I am saying that we need to be more creative in finding ways to "be". I think a lot of the ways that have developed in the last 40 years are off track and have forced us to take on roles that really are not helpful.
Whether we are talking about our home lives, our work lives, our family lives, or even beyond that, stereotypes and narrow thinking have never been a good idea.
Perhaps we will find a better way forward.
Once more there are news reports about polygamy, the practice of having more than one wife, and how abusive it is.
Admittedly, it always seems one-sided, there are not many stories of women with more than one husband. I can hear the jokes already.
I am not a fan of religious cults. And I certainly am not a fan of anything that even comes close to becoming abusive. But I do often think that there might be something a little odd about our North American way of life.
Instead of maintaining family bonds, we seem to do everything in our power to isolate ourselves from others. We are perhaps the opposite of polygamists -- we are loners bound together for personal gain.
Thomas Hobbes, one of my favourite social philosophers, said that the reason we establish communities is so we can keep an eye out for someone stealing our sheep. Okay, he didn't say it so simply, or quite like that, but he assumes we form relationships for self protection. He could be right. But I suspect there is more to it than that.
I think we need relationships because it fulfills us and allows us to develop into the people we are meant to be, and when we limit those relationships, we lose out on something.
When I was young my grandmother lived in the house with us. At one point I lived in a townhouse with another couple. My brother and his wife lived with me for a few months. And in each of those cases I remember life being better.
Our culture is getting more and more out of hand in terms of the demand it makes on average people. One income will not support a family anymore. The welfare system is ridiculous, you can make too much money for social assistance while at the same time not having enough for fuel oil.
So most people I know live in homes where there are two people working at careers, and where there is so much pressure and stress in those careers that what they really need to do at home is pass out. There is no time for grocery shopping, for cleaning, for connecting.
I have often thought about how much smoother everything would run with a multi-family configuration. Just imagine what it would be like to double the adults in a household. Imagine three or four incomes to pay for one house, one cable bill, and one heating bill. Imagine having more people around to help with chores, or to interact with kids.
There is simply no way that any one person can be everything for someone else, and there would be a lot less pressure if we were not so single minded in our definitions of relationship.
Now, before I get a lot of anti-polygamy hate mail; the old fashioned solution to what I am talking about is the multi-generational household. Where there are three or four generations of people living under one roof, contributing financially, and through their wisdom, to making everything work.
In most supposedly less developed countries this is still the norm.
And in those countries, children learn from grandparents how to do things, like fish, cook, think. They also come to understand morals, values, and families much more clearly than we ever do.
Another benefit is that we do not isolate the different generations, and shunt them off as no longer useful. Each person has a role no matter where they find themselves on the journey of life.
Don't get me wrong, I realize this is a pipe dream, and whenever I bring it up to people they remind me how hard it is for two people to get along, let alone three, four or more. Just deciding what to watch on television could become something that needs outside mediation.
And then there is the whole dealing with parents and in-laws issue. Discipline of kids and household management styles would certainly differ from person to person. So I don't claim that it would be easy by any stretch of the imagination to do this.
Still. . .
It supposedly takes a village to raise a child; and we have lost sight of that somehow. Most of us go through life relatively alone, and wishing we had closer friends, more family around, a better idea of what to do when something happens.
Community is an ideal that is worth going after.
I suppose it does not really matter where you get a sense of community; sitting on a school board, bowling league, church, or by actually trying to have relationships with your extended family. But we all need it.
I guess I am saying that we need to be more creative in finding ways to "be". I think a lot of the ways that have developed in the last 40 years are off track and have forced us to take on roles that really are not helpful.
Whether we are talking about our home lives, our work lives, our family lives, or even beyond that, stereotypes and narrow thinking have never been a good idea.
Perhaps we will find a better way forward.
Saturday, January 10, 2009
Many people are searching for answers
FAITH TODAY - Published Saturday January 10th, 2009
Perhaps you have heard someone say that they are "Spiritual" and not "Religious."
When questioned on this, most people will claim that they still believe in God, but no longer find an easy connection to God through church. An astounding number of people answer census questions claiming to believe in God; while most of those same people feel alienated from their religious tradition.
Their experience of church is often mired in the past, and specific to one or two congregations. They do not realize that there are people and places within organized religion that are searching for the same answers.
The Tatamagouche Centre in Nova Scotia is home to a multi-faith program which works to help people recognize a connection to a power greater than themselves. It is called the Atlantic Jubilee Program in Spiritual Guidance and Deepening.
"It seems that we human beings are hard wired to make sense of our lives, in other words, to live with a sense of meaning and purpose. At certain life stages, or after a personal crisis, we can become more aware of or sensitive to this drive. It may arise because of an unexpected turn of events in our life or manifest as an inner restlessness or a sense that something is missing from our lives," says Pam Breau, one of the leaders or the Jubilee program.
Sometimes it is better to work backwards into a definition. So here is what Spiritual Direction is not; it is not counselling, it is not therapy, and it is not financial advice.
Spiritual Direction is accompaniment along the journey. Most of us live our lives knowing that there just has to be more. By being intentional and working on our spiritual understanding, we can explore a deeper relationship with what it means to be human. Simply put, spiritual direction is helping people tell their sacred stories.
This is not limited to one denomination of Christianity, it is not limited to one path of faith, but rather is open to Buddhists, Jews, Islamic and Hindus alike. It is not even limited to those who already have it figured out, but are still questioning everything.
Spiritual direction helps us learn how to live in peace, with compassion, promoting justice, as humble servants of that which lies beyond all names.
"Many of us find a deeper experience of life through relationship with God (the Holy, Higher Power, Love, however we name the bigger reality). We live in a context that often separates how we live from our sense of the Holy, as if they are two separate realities. In Spiritual Direction, people find a safe place to share their story and rediscover (or discover for the first time) that God communicates with them in a very personal way. It can be a place of being deeply listened to as one searches for the words to express how the Holy One invites them to deeper and deeper life, relationship with self and others, and ultimately into Love and a desire to live God's dream for the world," continues Pam.
One thing that we do not have enough of is the sense that God is with us throughout this sometimes painful experience of living. Whether we are religious or spiritual, that sense can be deepened.
The Jubilee program takes in new students almost every June. There is also great benefit in finding your own Spiritual Director to assist you on the journey. The truth is that we need to acknowledge the spiritual nature of life more deeply. And a companion along the way is never a bad thing.
In the enquirer's pack for the program you find this prayer, which I think sums it all up:
I honour in you
that place in you
where the Lord resides
And when you
are in that place
in you
And I am
in that place
in me
Then there is
only one of us.
- Ancient Indian prayer: "Namaste"
Perhaps you have heard someone say that they are "Spiritual" and not "Religious."
When questioned on this, most people will claim that they still believe in God, but no longer find an easy connection to God through church. An astounding number of people answer census questions claiming to believe in God; while most of those same people feel alienated from their religious tradition.
Their experience of church is often mired in the past, and specific to one or two congregations. They do not realize that there are people and places within organized religion that are searching for the same answers.
The Tatamagouche Centre in Nova Scotia is home to a multi-faith program which works to help people recognize a connection to a power greater than themselves. It is called the Atlantic Jubilee Program in Spiritual Guidance and Deepening.
"It seems that we human beings are hard wired to make sense of our lives, in other words, to live with a sense of meaning and purpose. At certain life stages, or after a personal crisis, we can become more aware of or sensitive to this drive. It may arise because of an unexpected turn of events in our life or manifest as an inner restlessness or a sense that something is missing from our lives," says Pam Breau, one of the leaders or the Jubilee program.
Sometimes it is better to work backwards into a definition. So here is what Spiritual Direction is not; it is not counselling, it is not therapy, and it is not financial advice.
Spiritual Direction is accompaniment along the journey. Most of us live our lives knowing that there just has to be more. By being intentional and working on our spiritual understanding, we can explore a deeper relationship with what it means to be human. Simply put, spiritual direction is helping people tell their sacred stories.
This is not limited to one denomination of Christianity, it is not limited to one path of faith, but rather is open to Buddhists, Jews, Islamic and Hindus alike. It is not even limited to those who already have it figured out, but are still questioning everything.
Spiritual direction helps us learn how to live in peace, with compassion, promoting justice, as humble servants of that which lies beyond all names.
"Many of us find a deeper experience of life through relationship with God (the Holy, Higher Power, Love, however we name the bigger reality). We live in a context that often separates how we live from our sense of the Holy, as if they are two separate realities. In Spiritual Direction, people find a safe place to share their story and rediscover (or discover for the first time) that God communicates with them in a very personal way. It can be a place of being deeply listened to as one searches for the words to express how the Holy One invites them to deeper and deeper life, relationship with self and others, and ultimately into Love and a desire to live God's dream for the world," continues Pam.
One thing that we do not have enough of is the sense that God is with us throughout this sometimes painful experience of living. Whether we are religious or spiritual, that sense can be deepened.
The Jubilee program takes in new students almost every June. There is also great benefit in finding your own Spiritual Director to assist you on the journey. The truth is that we need to acknowledge the spiritual nature of life more deeply. And a companion along the way is never a bad thing.
In the enquirer's pack for the program you find this prayer, which I think sums it all up:
I honour in you
that place in you
where the Lord resides
And when you
are in that place
in you
And I am
in that place
in me
Then there is
only one of us.
- Ancient Indian prayer: "Namaste"
Wednesday, January 7, 2009
Why does nobody ever serve soy milk?
SOCIAL STUDIES - Published Monday January 5th, 2009
Here is a pet peeve. It is not a large one, but nonetheless; why do most restaurants and fast food places only have milk?
I have recently discovered I am allergic to milk. Not just lactose intolerant, which is manageable, but allergic to the protein found in milk. Anyone who has ever eaten soy cheese, soy yoghurt, or soy sour cream will feel my pain.
But seriously, lactose intolerance is the scourge of the modern world. I am not sure whether it is additives or overuse that has caused so many human beings to no longer be able to digest it, but these people need soy milk as well.
So we have a significant percentage of the population being lactose intolerant; and we have milk and milk products as the third most common food allergy amongst North Americans; and we have Tim Hortons, arguably the place where most of us go for coffee.
The only choice there is black. I guess it saves on calories if you drink it like that; but I like my coffee cut a little with something, anything, that is white.
It could not be that hard to pick up a few litres of soy milk. There are a hundred varieties in the grocery store. And for all those who are in the same boat and do not know this, you can get a soy latte at Starbucks pretty easily. It will cost you more though.
While we are at this; my wife has her own Tim Hortons pet peeve. In an age where power is getting harder and harder to come by, and where the manufacturing of electronics wastes tons of carbon, everyone seems to be installing a myriad of flat screen televisions as decoration.
Really, does seeing them dip the Boston cream donut in chocolate in high definition make you buy one? I was either going to get the donut or not. Most of us do not need any urging to buy products at Tim's.
Or how about the fact that Wal-Mart assumes that most of us cannot control our ADHD enough to stand in line for three minutes. They have installed LCD televisions that drop down from the sky like candy and play senseless, poorly drawn cartoons which I think are supposed to double as product placement ads.
Of course, by the time you are in line in Wal-Mart, surrounded by a hundred jostling people all trying to get their kids to quiet down, there is no way in tarnation that you are going to leave the line and go back and pick up whatever they flash on the screen. By that point all you want it to get out of there.
So again, what purpose could these serve, except to waste both our time and our energy?
Think about this -- if you were not being hypnotized by mindless images you might actually take the time to talk to the person standing beside you in line. Imagine.
The other week I was in Belleville, Ontario, and I managed to talk the hotel manager into giving me a $200 a night room for $95. Just because I took the time to know their name, joke with them, ask them about the history of the hotel, and generally be interested in them as a person.
The sad thing is that when you do take an interest in the people around you they tend to react like no one ever thought to do that before. They were probably all watching TV.
Try this for starters. When someone who has been working all day trying to please other people asks you routinely how you are, tell them. Then ask how they are. When they answer "good", which they always will, look them straight in the eyes, pause, arch your eyebrow and say "really?" Trust me, no one ever feels so nondescript that "good" could cover it all. But we have forgotten how to interact with people in the real world. It is far easier to e-mail, text, phone, or ignore the people around us. And so we fail to even think that biding our time by conversing with other people we encounter along the way is an option.
Most of us do spend a significant part of our lives out there in the stores, running errands, preparing for the holidays, or just trying to keep house and home together. Urban planners of every generation have always been trying to create "malls" or common areas where we could all come together and talk, share, play -- become a community.
Then someone gets the bright idea to install televisions and push us all back into ourselves. We become so content with ignoring everything around us that community is the furthest thing from our mind. We really have to rebel against that tendency.
And if you work for Tim Hortons, pick me up some Soy milk, will you?
Here is a pet peeve. It is not a large one, but nonetheless; why do most restaurants and fast food places only have milk?
I have recently discovered I am allergic to milk. Not just lactose intolerant, which is manageable, but allergic to the protein found in milk. Anyone who has ever eaten soy cheese, soy yoghurt, or soy sour cream will feel my pain.
But seriously, lactose intolerance is the scourge of the modern world. I am not sure whether it is additives or overuse that has caused so many human beings to no longer be able to digest it, but these people need soy milk as well.
So we have a significant percentage of the population being lactose intolerant; and we have milk and milk products as the third most common food allergy amongst North Americans; and we have Tim Hortons, arguably the place where most of us go for coffee.
The only choice there is black. I guess it saves on calories if you drink it like that; but I like my coffee cut a little with something, anything, that is white.
It could not be that hard to pick up a few litres of soy milk. There are a hundred varieties in the grocery store. And for all those who are in the same boat and do not know this, you can get a soy latte at Starbucks pretty easily. It will cost you more though.
While we are at this; my wife has her own Tim Hortons pet peeve. In an age where power is getting harder and harder to come by, and where the manufacturing of electronics wastes tons of carbon, everyone seems to be installing a myriad of flat screen televisions as decoration.
Really, does seeing them dip the Boston cream donut in chocolate in high definition make you buy one? I was either going to get the donut or not. Most of us do not need any urging to buy products at Tim's.
Or how about the fact that Wal-Mart assumes that most of us cannot control our ADHD enough to stand in line for three minutes. They have installed LCD televisions that drop down from the sky like candy and play senseless, poorly drawn cartoons which I think are supposed to double as product placement ads.
Of course, by the time you are in line in Wal-Mart, surrounded by a hundred jostling people all trying to get their kids to quiet down, there is no way in tarnation that you are going to leave the line and go back and pick up whatever they flash on the screen. By that point all you want it to get out of there.
So again, what purpose could these serve, except to waste both our time and our energy?
Think about this -- if you were not being hypnotized by mindless images you might actually take the time to talk to the person standing beside you in line. Imagine.
The other week I was in Belleville, Ontario, and I managed to talk the hotel manager into giving me a $200 a night room for $95. Just because I took the time to know their name, joke with them, ask them about the history of the hotel, and generally be interested in them as a person.
The sad thing is that when you do take an interest in the people around you they tend to react like no one ever thought to do that before. They were probably all watching TV.
Try this for starters. When someone who has been working all day trying to please other people asks you routinely how you are, tell them. Then ask how they are. When they answer "good", which they always will, look them straight in the eyes, pause, arch your eyebrow and say "really?" Trust me, no one ever feels so nondescript that "good" could cover it all. But we have forgotten how to interact with people in the real world. It is far easier to e-mail, text, phone, or ignore the people around us. And so we fail to even think that biding our time by conversing with other people we encounter along the way is an option.
Most of us do spend a significant part of our lives out there in the stores, running errands, preparing for the holidays, or just trying to keep house and home together. Urban planners of every generation have always been trying to create "malls" or common areas where we could all come together and talk, share, play -- become a community.
Then someone gets the bright idea to install televisions and push us all back into ourselves. We become so content with ignoring everything around us that community is the furthest thing from our mind. We really have to rebel against that tendency.
And if you work for Tim Hortons, pick me up some Soy milk, will you?
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