EROS

Faith Today - Times and Transcript - February 11th 2012

As an aside, I have been researching an article for Valentine’s Day about how to celebrate it in the most creative ways without breaking the bank. What I have discovered is that 90% of the people out there are either traditional, buy a rose or a box of chocolate type people; or they are the “scrooge” of Valentine’s Day.

In the Ancient Greek language there were different words for different types of love. First off there was Storge, which simply means affection. Then comes Philia, which is an affection type love, like friendship. Then we have Agape, which might be seen as “true love” or deep love, or sacrificial love… some sort of love that risks everything. Finally, there is Eros, which is passion, plain and simple. The modern word “erotic” comes from this Greek word.

Now, you might be saying, “so what” by this point. But I maintain that the English language causes us problems because it has so few words. Course and barbaric as it is, we only have the word, “Love” which is supposed to mean everything from how I feel about Roast Beef right through my bond with my children, and on to the person I share a romantic Valentine’s Dinner with.

Clearly, those are all different feelings. That is where, perhaps, we get confused. Valentine’s Day is a celebration of and for Eros; plain and simple.

The day actually is a religious holiday, one of the many “Saint Days” of the original church declared to honour Valentine, or Valentinus in Latin, who was martyred in Rome. The problem is that there were actually 14 Bishop Valentinus (Valentinii?) martyred, it is a popular name meaning strong or powerful.

Then the story took on a bit of a romantic twist…

Although this is not actually what historically happened, and there seems to be no such law on the books, legend said that under Emperor Claudius II there was a law that all young men should remain single, probably so they could easily be drafted into the Legion. Valentine then supposedly acted as a go between, carrying love notes in secret, and even performing secret weddings. And because of this he was killed.   

Thus on his feast day we trade love notes and celebrate romance.

So back to my opening point; as I have been asking the question, what do you do for Valentine’s Day most people tell me they buy chocolates or go out to a restaurant. Neither of which is very special in our day and age, and both of which are celebrating Agape, not Eros.

I mean, if this Valentine guy was willing to go to the grave in order to preserve our right to be romantic, shouldn’t we? If Jesus came that we might have full and abundant life? Shouldn’t we?

Religion at its core is about how we are as people. It is saying that we were created to be fully in tune with our selves, our world and each other. Christianity is a religion that puts love at the centre of all we do; so does Judaism and Islam and they do not just mean this agape type of deep love.

Some of the greatest erotic love poetry is actually found in the Bible, in Song of Solomon, which begins with these lines: “Kiss me, make me drunk with your kisses! Your sweet loving is better than wine.” And only gets racier from there.

My point is this, if we are creations of God, and if we are to live life to its fullest as Jesus suggests, then that means loving to its fullest as well. Do not let another Valentine’s Day go by without embracing some passion for those you love. Many have lived loved and lost so that we could be free to take one day of the year and show our love in an over the top way.

Not doing so would be a sin.

The Times and Transcript has made its online copy a "pay to see" service. So I am going to resume posting my columns on this site after the fact.

FAITH TODAY - Times and Transcript - December 2011

Most of us self-identify in some way. We are happy today, or sad; we are young, or old; we are male, or female.

Some of those identifications get thrown onto us, like whether we are part of the lower economic trenches or the middle class, or wealthy. When people say someone is poor, they have an image in their mind, and whether or not you fit into that, you are labeled.

Some of them are classic genetic differences that we cannot really do anything about, like being left handed; or fitting more into the world as an introvert or an extrovert.

So you are religious or atheist, right?

The best line ever in my education was this story about one of our professors. He was teaching a first year religious studies class at university; those classes are almost always filled with hundreds of curious students by the way and one very angry young man confronted the teacher after a lecture.

“I don’t know why I’m even here,” he said, “I don’t believe in God!”

To which the wise professor replied, “Tell me about this God, perhaps I don’t believe in them either.”

This is what always gets to me when I read books like Christopher Hitchins “God is not great” where he argues against Christians as being silly. Well, I have been ordained for 16 years, I went to church for a couple of decades before that, and I have undertaken four university degrees in religious studies; and you know what, I think the Christians he is talking about are silly too.  

He picked one narrow definition of someone who is religious and attacked them as the stand in for everyone.

Pick any issue of the faith that you are concerned about – were we created or did we spontaneously erupt from protoplasm, for example, and there will be people in the church, the synagogue, the mosque or the temple who will believe every single scientific and philosophical variation of this issue possible.

In other words, religious people are just as human and just as different as anyone.

I guess I mention this for two reasons: the first is that when I say I am a Christian, I am often judged, and judged in a way that is not very accurate of who I am. Most Christians for example, seem to argue I am not. 

Which is neither here nor there, just that we do not all come from a cookie cutter mould.

The second reason is that one of the things that has brought religion to its cast off state is this precise problem. People in the church think everyone has to be the same, or think the same, and act the same. We assume when people come to worship they are all looking for one thing.

Think about it, for the majority of people worship is: 200 year old music, liturgical moments where the leader does something almost magical, prayers that sound the same as they always have.

Now, on the plus side, tradition evokes emotion and allows us to easily enter into the experience. On the negative side, they are all cookie cutter moments designed for one type of person.

Within the pews of my church as an example, I have six generations of people. Some of them grew up listening to swing music, some to hippy folk music, and some to techno pop. What music should I play to inspire an emotional response from them?

There are people out there who firmly believed that moral issues like abortion, divorce, homosexuality and the like are so bad we should not even talk about them; while the people younger than me cannot even fathom why these should be issues.

And when it comes to faith my parents grew up in a world where a Catholic would not talk to a Protestant; by the time I was maturing that seemed silly, but there was no way a Muslim or a Jew or Buddhist was right about anything. For those born today they will not be able to fathom why we thought there was such a big difference between any religions.

Whether we are talking about church or culture, the one thing we need to do as soon as possible is realize that almost everyone is different. So let’s respect that and incorporate it into how we do the things we do. 

Then, perhaps, we can turn this world around.